2) Purge your medicine cabinet of old perfume/cologne.

If it’s been more than three months since you opened the bottle, pour it down the sink (and then replace your sink) because there’s nothing worse than walking into a festival gala and smelling like last year’s air kiss.

3) Research, research, research.

Have you even looked at this year’s glitter list? It doesn’t take a genius to spot low hanging A-list fruit like Brad Pitt or Salma Hayek. But what about C-listers like Carlos Sorin? Do you have any clue how to drop Diego Noguera’s name in conversation? And if you plan on tweeting that Kaat Beels is at the Starbucks on Yorkville, wouldn’t it help to know if s/he’s male or female?

4) Develop a stylish dietary affectation.

Is there anything more pathetic than someone who pours regular half-and-half into their fair-trade Americano? This year’s coffee whitener is Takin, a politically repressed Chinese goat-antelope whose milk is the talk of Brooklyn. Request it in a manner that is both courteous and witheringly judgmental. Practise in front of the mirror. And don’t stop until you get it just right.

Source: Globe and Mail